I'm not sure the exact date it all happened, but sometime between 2012 and 2014 V-neck shirts exploded onto the scene. Don't get my wrong, they've been around for quite some time, but mostly worn by members of emo bands, skateboarders, and those dubbed most hip. But now even the most average of Joes are rocking V-necks like cargo pants in the 90's. So... whaddupwitdat? As an avid V-neck wearer myself, I've decided to explore why V-necks have become an American fashion staple and have kicked the commonly rocked crew neck to the side.
V-necks make fatter people still look fashionable
As a man on the larger side myself (#BBB remember...), I am constantly looking for ways to make myself look less out of shape and more cool. Introducing... the black V-neck. Man boobs turn into speed bumps and the revealing V-neck section reveals a tuft of manly chest hair. I just went from "total shlub" to "look at that bub!" in just one article of clothing or less. Amazing. Conversely, the crew neck holds everything up at the top of the torso and can turn a casual tee into a tent if you're not careful.
They make you look more interesting or even cultured
Dad culture is sweeping the nation, normalizing "dad" habits and making Nike Monarchs and Green Eggs a part of the mainstream. While this is hilarious and all, a man who is single does not want to slip too early into dad culture. How many dads do you see rocking V-necks that don't live in SoCal? That's what I thought. Separate yourself from the paunchy dad life by entering into the V-neck scene.
But... my main concern...
Is how deep that V goes. There is a fine line between a casual break in the neckline and looking like you just got gripped up and sucker punched by Jersey Shore's very own Ronnie. You absolutely have to respect the V, because you can go from sprucing up your #BodybyBourbon look with a sensible V to playing trashcan bongos on Redondo Beach in just a few precious inches. Love the V. Be the V. Respect the V.
Thoughts on V-necks? Are you not a fat guy and still rock the V? Well you probably look great, mazel. Sound off in the comments.
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